Wyoming has taken swift action to allow wolf torture. The Wyoming state legislature passed a bill 91-2 allowing the torture of wolves following an outcry involving hunter, Cody Roberts, and the Green River Bar. When asked if Wyoming would consider legislation to protect wolves, the Wyoming Game and Fish Department responded, “Fuck no. A wolf could try to eat my beef cattle before me. We have to be able to go Goffrey from Game of Thrones on these canines.”

After running over an injured, juvenile wolf with his snowmobile, Roberts tied his mouth with duck tape and brought him to the Green River Bar in Sublette County, Wyoming. There Roberts paraded the wolf around the bar for hours taking pictures with the dejected looking wolf as he drank beer. Eventually, Roberts shot and killed the wolf.

Previously Wyoming law allowed the murder of wolves but not the torture. Lauren Boebert of Colorado praised the Wyoming legislature’s move to legalize wolf torture. “Trump took wolves off the endangered species list with the blessing of Jesus Christ himself but bludgeoning wolves with a snowmobile is not enough cruelty against these animals. I applaud Wyoming for taking a stand against the liberal tear jerking and being in a leader in animal cruelty.” Boebert told Plant-Based Fake News.

Roberts was issued only a $250 fine; however, the Green River Bar has already begun advertising their premises as the place to torture more wolves once the new law goes into effect. Beating, torturing, and leaving gay men to die had to stop after Matthew Shepard – but Wyoming residents now have free range to inflict any and all cruelty and torture on wolves.